Loving You Forever

As moonbeams were glistening across the river’s surface, they laughed and played with youthful vivacity while skinny dipping. Their inhibitions had flown free and lit up the evening sky. Splashing, embracing, that first kiss, all in defiance of a world from which a dictate stated that to love each other was forbidden.

Too young to understand, too young to even care, all they knew was, there was a longing inside they held for each other that needed to be satisfied. That moment came as they walked to the river’s edge and relinquished their virginity to one another. It was more than making love, it was a love declaration.

Promising each other that the love they were sharing would last through out this lifetime and that nothing would ever come between them. How naïve this would prove to be as they were only students in high school without a care in the world. Still trying to find their direction.

Her upbringing was seen as privileged while his was seen as instability. While her Mother was in full support, her Father was adamantly against it and threatened to disown her if their involvement continued. His family was fully supportive although they sternly warned him against his attempt to subvert the obstacle of prejudice. They managed to sneak around for months on end, seeing each other at school and whenever they could outside of it.

Their relationship continued this way as the school years passed and when the time for graduation came around, her Father took measures into his hands and sent her away to college effectively putting an end to the relationship. They both went on to live happy and productive lives.

That was 30 years ago when the world was still seeing through a black and white lens. She was white and he was black

Now as they stand before each other in the shopping center, both temporarily having come back to their hometown for various reasons. The excitement and energy flows between them as it once did. They talk about the old times. How they met, what they shared  and what may have been. Before leaving to go their separate ways once again, she reveals that her son was name after him while he imparts his daughter was named after her.


Rory


©rj2010

A Safe Harbor

shortly after midnight
certain there is no one in sight

no longer must he hide
the true feelings that are inside

free from the smiles
offered only to beguile

With his head bowed he welcomes isolation having grown accustomed to it.  A melancholic stasis he enters into, that being his nightly ritual. Once again his mind is being bombarded with resentments and ideations.

he has rescinded upon
many of his decisions

hesitation followed with immense frustration
irritability followed with intense exasperation

a sense of hopelessness, a routine filled with no purpose
he struggles to identify with his lack of self worth

The wrenching in his stomach has taken hold again. Days have gone by since his body has been provided with proper nutrition. What he hungers for the most however, is human touch, closeness, a peaceful co-existence. Only this will feed his soul.

this will be another night without sleep
the aches in his body are running too deep

emptiness, sadness, misplaced guilt
together infused are inhibiting his will

dare he reach out? he doesn’t think he can
believing that no one will come to understand

There he remains on the floor motionless, hours upon hours. His emotions have crystallized into an ocean of tears, this being where he has found a safe harbor. He awaits the moment that his thoughts and feelings are to take their temporary leave as usual, for the sun will be rising soon.


Rory




©rj2010

Of Unknown Origin

(soft erotica short)

 

If looks could kill, he would have been dead at first glance. Not only was the look in her eyes fierce, it was menacing. Piercing through every atom that comprised his body. She just stood there, livid, staring him down.  He could offer no words. Obviously she was angry but as to why, he had not a clue. Hastily she began to undress, her anger fumigating the entire room until finally she was completely nude.

Suddenly from out of nowhere (*whack*), she slaps him across the face. Striking him with such force that the impact sounded more like a small caliber pistol had went off. He stood there, in shock with a “what was that for” look on his face. She continued on by yanking the shirt off of his chest and ripping it to shreds. He attempts to grab her bear hug style but to no avail. She was a little quicker and pushes him down on the bed. Growing increasingly bewildered by the second  he wants to get to the bottom of this but ceases his resistance so as not to allow tensions to escalate.

Whatever is bothering her, he decided it best to just let her get it out of her system. She says nothing to him and continues on. His pants are unbuckled and unzipped. Along with his underwear, they are hurriedly removed and thrown across the room. Now laying flat on the bed, the result of another angry push to his chest, he can feel her fellation. Of course he was aroused but for her it wasn’t about his pleasure, there was an all together different purpose behind her giving.

She continued on frenetically for several moments until he achieved a full erection. She then mounts him. Pressing firmly down on his chest to hold him in place she begins to ride him, each stroke increasing with force and intensity. He closes his eyes and finds his way to a synchronization with her movements. Moments later he matches her intensity. However, still without full knowledge of why all of this is transpiring. Harder and faster she rides. Seizing full control of him while losing control of herself.

Deep love, extreme hatred, dissidence, exasperation all embodied within the expression of her movements. Until he could no longer hold back against the power of her determination. After the expulsion of his surrender he lay there both amazed and befuddled. She dismounts him and retrieves her clothes. As she leaves the room headed towards the bathroom for a shower, she looks back at him and yells….

...“YOU ASSHOLE”


Rory


©rj2010

Purpose

I hear all these motha fuckin voices going through my head
everyday I gotta sift through them because I like ‘em all
except for the one that wishes I was dead
besides, all I know is that, God must be a Goddess
yeah I say that
I say that because…
…only the yin principle offers up compassion and understanding
the type that’s good for the whole world
they said it was some kind of diagnosis
had the nerve to call me, how do you say?
…phrenic, schizo or somethin
tryin to push some pills on me
nah nah, you aint gonna control me like that
what you looking at? honkin your horn at me
Mr. Man in the Mercedes
Mr. Babylonian slave
you’re the only one they have under control
they tell you what to think
...what to feel
and you look at me like I’m just some dumpster diving vagrant
what’s wrong with you?
at least I don't backslide
I gotta purpose to serve
I gotta feed the birds
they listen to me
then I gotta pick up all this stuff you guys throw away on the street
gotta keep the Earth clean
I see you
money is all you pursue
and all you come up with is materialistic….. how do you say?
…trivialities, or whatever
let me tell you something about counter intelligence
you got to sound intelligent
…when you step up to the counter and order coffee
that’s why everyday my coffee is free
my Barista gives it to me
she likes me
she says I make her smile
she thinks I’m wise
then we start laughing together
…but I think she’s the one who's funny
I'm not wise
I only shared with her one secret
something the trees told me
ok two, because the wind tells me things all the time too
I’m watching you too Mr. Man in the Mercedes
so run along and don’t be late
go sit in your bullshit meetings like you do everyday
analyzing your productivity charts and see if youre on course…
…to realize the total destruction of the world as you have so carefully planned out
oh and be sure they serve fruit cup at your next company party
I oughta put my foot in your ass
…but I was told never to harm the weak
you see
I am compassionate
I am free
you wish you were free like me
so what, maybe I am crazy
told you 'bout these motha fucking voices I'm tryin to sort out
...but I got a heartbeat too
if you heard my heartbeat
maybe then you would know love
I gotta feed the birds
I gotta make people smile
I like me
I got a purpose

Rory


©rj2010

A Chat Noir

(short story)

With police lights flickering against a night mist that is hovering just above the city both uniformed officers and plain clothes detectives have emerged on the scene and  have begun gathering and exchanging what little information that is available. As they search the bottom floor apartment of the complex, initially all they could ascertain was a crime had been committed although in all actuality it appears that a crime hasn’t been committed. There was no forced entry, no sign of struggle, no fingerprints. Who ever did this knew exactly what they were doing. What exactly happened anyway? That is the question that leaves them confounded. All they know was that a young woman has gone missing and has not been heard from for more than 72 hours.

After canvassing the surrounding neighborhood of this apartment community for the better part of two hours, all the officers presently involved in the case came up with virtually nothing as far clues go. A young woman in her late 20’s - early 30’s, with black hair and olive skin between 5’2 and 5’5 inches tall and very pretty was the description that most of the residents gave. She kept to herself, usually smiled but never really stopped to make conversation and she could always be seen with her laptop. She would be seen at the local coffee house just down the street, sipping on a cup of  java while doing something seemingly very important on her computer. One resident even said they would see her through the blinds late at night sitting in her living and doing something on her computer.

That would be the only clue yielded to this mysterious disappearance as the forensic team found her laptop in the apartment. Everything else on the scene seemed intact. The kitchen was clean, the living room area was clean, the bathroom was clean and the bed was made. Save for a few fingerprints, the laptop was all they had. It was apparent that someone cleaned up behind themselves if indeed a crime was committed. The two lead detectives gut instincts was telling them that it was so. The laptop was taken to crime lab for evaluation and detectives went back to the station house to do a follow up. Apparently the call came in from someone from several states away pretending to be a relative who in reality was only a chat buddy. Someone who chatted with her on a nightly basis. They had feared something had happened and placed the missing persons call. The detectives urgently wanted to talk to this person.

NEXT MORNING:

The crime lab results were in and chat logs were discovered on the laptop and promptly given to the detectives for them to analyze. A very close look at the logs began to reveal the victims chat patterns and more clues were being identified. Her chat name was Luscious and while she chatted with several people online it appears she had very intensive chat sessions with someone who went by the screen name of Watcher. They would look even closer at the chat sessions between them over the last several days as for now they have an identity of interest to pursue.

Chat Log Entry: Day One

watcher:
luscious you there?
luscious:
hi hun
watcher:
i've been nudging you for a while now, where have you been
luscious:
LOL, no you haven’t ive been online all night
watcher:
dammit luscious don’t play games with me, are you chatting with someone else
luscious:
sorry hun, yes I saw your nudges, but I was afraid you would scold me again
watcher:
i should but i won't, i spoil you too much, you know i will do anything for you but you didn’t obey me, why?
luscious:
i just didn’t feel like it last night hun
watcher:
DO IT NOW!
luscious:
right now?
watcher:
Yes right now, touch yourself right now
luscious:
Ok Ok
watcher:
you know I can tell if you’re doing it or not
luscious:
yes
watcher:
that’s my girl, cum for me
luscious:
yes, wait

several minutes pass

luscious:
back, did you feel it?
watcher:
yes, goods girl
luscious:
that was for you
watcher:
yes, you belong to me
luscious:
yes, always
watcher:
say it again
luscious:
I belong to you, ALWAYS!!!
watcher:
don’t forget it, ever
luscious:
I won’t
luscious:
so what are you up to tonight hun?
watcher:
I gotta go now
luscious:
but wait I wanted to ask you something
luscious:
are you still there?
luscious:
hun wait
you bastard

Chat Log Entry: Day Two
luscious:
hi hun, you there
watcher:
hello my sweet
luscious:
don’t call me sweet, you pissed me off last night
watcher:
how?
luscious:
don’t ever leave me like that again
watcher:
I had things I had to do
luscious:
but I needed you
watcher:
yeah tell that to those other men you’re chatting with
luscious:
am not
watcher:
don’t lie to me
luscious:
why do you never believe me when I tell you things
watcher:
I know you
luscious:
maybe
watcher:
no maybe’s, You’ve been drinking again, you’re drunk right now aren’t you
luscious:
so what, what do you care
luscious:
I just wanted to know if you love me
watcher:
ask me when you’re not drunk
luscious:
am not
watcher:
you betray me every time you lie to me
luscious:
I need to know if you love me
watcher:
I see everything you do, I feel your every thought, know your every move
luscious:
why, why me??
watcher:
stop asking questions and stop being childish
luscious:
why should I keep obeying you if I can’t know that you love me
watcher:
you should already
luscious:
you never tell me anything anymore
watcher:
stop your bullshit with other men online
luscious:
i’m not doing anything
watcher:
i told you stop lying to me
luscious:
LOL, you’re paranoid, thought you can see everything
watcher:
good nite, chat with you another time
luscious:
HEY WAIT! YOU BASTARD

Chat Log Entry: Day Three

watcher:
you there my sweet
luscious:
don’t call me that
watcher:
what’s you’re problem now?
luscious:
you left me again last night
watcher:
you’re drunk
luscious:
am not go to hell!!
watcher:
LOL, I love it when you’re feisty
luscious:
I HATE YOU!!
watcher:
touch yourself again
luscious:
no never again
watcher:
do as you’re told
luscious:
FUCK OFF I HATE YOU!
watcher:
do as you’re told or I’ll come and make you do it
luscious:
oh whatever, I don’t believe you
luscious:
you don’t know where I’m at and you’ll never find me
you’re just some lonely guy on the other end of a computer
watcher:
watch your mouth
luscious:
you treat me like I’m nothing, like I’m your toy you can toss around anytime you  feel like it
watcher:
shut up!! You’re pissing me off
luscious:
good, see what it feels like you asshole
watcher:
i’m warning you, shut and obey me, do as your told NOW!!
luscious:
LMAO, not gonna, you don’t care about me, so why should I
watcher:
i’m warning you luscious
luscious:
i’m gonna go chat with someone who respects me, bye xxooxx
watcher:
luscious wait
watcher:
LUSCIOUS WAIT!!! YOU THERE?
watcher:
YOU BITCH, I WARNED YOU
luscious:
LOL, you’re paranoid, thought you can see everything, ciao xoxoxo

Chat Log Entry: Day Four
No more entries found

Thinking that they were on to something with a solid lead obtained from the chat logs, the detectives immediately requested that the IP address associated with the user name “Watcher” be found in hopes that it will direct them to the exact location where the instant messages were sent from. It was a long shot because who in their right mind would stay where they could be easily located after what appears to be kidnapping. The IP location was discovered to be several states away so the case detectives immediately called in the feds for assistance while catching the next flight to the location. It took about twelve hours for to get the federal warrant needed to make a search and to assemble a tactical team. With everything in place the team descends upon and surrounds the address where the “Watcher” IM transmissions were sent from. A small house in a heavily wooded area in a small town

After giving several warnings officers kick the door in and immediately begin to scour this tiny house. Initially nothing is found in the upstairs portion of the house. It’s a bit messy but they can tell that someone has been here recently. Then a faint noise come from the downstairs portion of the house. Officers quietly go down the steps and position themselves in front of a bedroom door where the noise is coming from. The noise is getting louder, moaning, as if a sex act was occurring. They ask whoever is behind the door to peacefully surrender themselves. No response, just continued moaning. After issuing a second warning the door is kicked in, the officers enter the room and draw their weapons. They are greeted with a chesire cat like grin from a woman who despite appearances seems to fit the description. Unfazed by the presence of the officers and the imminent danger she takes a puff from a cigarette and says to them candidly, "I don't imagine you all are here to watch".

Rory


©rj2010

Thugs Existence

living a thug’s existence
his prowess on the streets was relentless

down with the crew

everyday, taxing fools
late night, out on the grind
they approach him, only wanting a dime
 he serves them up
claiming their area code and flashing their signs
gunfire erupts
a couple of dead bodies
yellow tape, blood puddles’, chalked outlines
this it what happens to the rough and the tough
so it’s off to prison again

he’s already given them at least ten
apparently he didn’t get enough
can’t let it bother him
he has to represent
gun towers, barbed wire fences
mean muggin’, slammin’ bones
telling stories of how it goes down back home
having to put up with a certain stench
fights breaking out for reasons unknown
getting rolled up on and taken to the hole
he has go through this for a minimum of 25 more
false pride, emptiness inside, his ego deflated

the next cell over, a man being penetrated
no one ever shows up on visiting day
never will he be able to watch his kids play
lost his freedom, locked in the system
forever living a thug’s existence


Rory

©rj2009/10

The Dilemma She Faces

awakened by the warmth and the crackling from the fireplace
wondering how long she has been sitting there asleep
she giggles
it was such an enjoyable time with him last night at the theatre
that last martini afterwards did it for her however, one too many
oh well, “you only live once” she concedes
something she has always believed
where is he anyway?
her loins throbbing with desire
she looks around the room for him, she's been waiting
her vision is somewhat blurry
trying to focus, trying to regain her equilibrium
a light flowery scent breezes past her nose
perfume, but its not hers she acknowledges
doesn’t smell familiar but she likes it
where is it coming from?
she can see two silhouettes near her
“is that you?” she mutters
giggling again
the scent is becoming more pronounced
it’s moving closer
she can see a bit clearer now
it is him, and another woman
what are they doing? what’s happening? she asks herself
the other woman reaches to touch her
confessions within
a long time ago she was bi-curios and open to the experience
just a phase she thought all young girls went through
that’s all in the past now and has been laid to rest
besides she has never told him about it
even though they’ve been together for a little more than two years
..their marriage is solid she thought
sure they fuss and fight and have differences between them
…but isn’t it like that with all married couples?
she was only kidding when she suggested they have a threesome
never has she seriously considered partaking in it
least of all with her husband
…dizzy and getting dizzier, her head is spinning
she acknowledges this woman is pretty
“her body is hot” thinking to herself
he’s smiling at her
is this what he wants her to do?
she can feel a softness touching her thighs
her loins now flaming, her body reacting to soft moans and whispers
gradually succumbing to this lustful temptation
this could be so delectable but...
she's not clear if she can see herself going through with it
… her decision must be made

Rory


©rj2010






Music Playlist at MixPod.com

Maybe God Lied

(a narrative observation of a guy totally fed up)

he was well past being down on his luck..
…and for goodness sakes, he sure has tried
at the point to where he just couldn’t give a fuck…
…and thinking that perhaps God had lied

this is what happened

really, it all started after he broke up with his girl
I Think her name was Maria
he was faithful, grateful, and every Sunday he went to church…
…but she would never go with him because she was into Santeria

ever since that happened, he just had never been the same
intoxication lead to conflicts, conflicts that lead to indecision
…and if you hear him tell it, the spell she cast on him was to blame
now just trying to stay in his right mind, is his only mission

he keeps looking to sky and saying, “Damn, God must have lied”

spun him out a little because he started opening fortune cookies
…and heeding the advise from store front gypsies
having his palm read, and then when a Tarot card revealed…
….that soon he would dead, he became a regular at the curbside ministry

willing even to go see a witch doctor, or perhaps sit and listen to Kokopelli
he read from four different bibles and five books on philosophy…
…and each time he saw a statue of Buddha, he would rub its belly
but things just never seemed to get right in his life, thus his plea…

“God please!! “

(he just wants some answers)

his belief now is, all those religions only lead to negative experiences
according to all he has witnessed, so all the reading material just sits on a shelf
…no way will he ever listen to any more God inferences (thinks it’s all a lie)
still he harbors the hope of one day finding words of God within himself

Rory


©rj2010